It’s summertime! There’s nothing better than the sun on my pasty, sunscreened skin and wind in my hair. It’s not all hiking, parks, and breweries though… well… not entirely. Here’s what else is going on:
- Mom & Dad left without me for a whole week recently. I can’t imagine why. It must have been so boring.
- Luckily, Grandma Cindy held down the fort while the rents were off being bored somewhere. And by “held down the fort”, I mean catered to my every desire. We played fun games, like the one where I sort through all the items in the kitchen cabinets. We also partied at 2AM a couple times, similarly to what Mom and I enjoy doing on the regular. Unfortunately, I couldn’t talk her into allowing me unlimited access to cheese. #foiled
- It was super gray and gross the entire month of May. To boost morale, I started clapping. A lot. Ate a blueberry? Clap for that. Sneeze? Clap for that. Running water for my bath? So many claps.
- Speaking of – Bath time is the. Best. Nothing gets me pumped up like an after-dinner bath. It works out nicely since I often
bathe ineat hummus or pasta for dinner. Also, Grandma Cindy bought me every bath toy in the state of Connecticut, so I could stay in the tub for hours. Mom lets me stay in for quite a while. Unless I poop. That’s right, poop. In the tub. Mom freaked out last time I did this, but I mean, baths are warm and relaxing. Give me a break.
- Second to bath time, my favorite activity has been getting myself into dangerous situations while mom runs around frantically in an attempt to prevent my demise. Little by little, I’ve successfully hacked away at Mom’s energy level however, ensuring myself the freedom to explore the apartment independently from time-to-time. The newspapers, expensive electronic equipment, and Mom & Dad’s books are my favorite items to chew on. My books are okay, but not as easily destroyed as the rents’ books, and thus not as enjoyable.
- This is a real-life picture of Mom changing my diaper recently:
- I have some pretty cute tricks up my sleeve now. The most effective is the “kiss”. When Mom or Dad asks me for a kiss, I get super serious, lean in for a smooch (open mouthed or closed, depending on my mood), then shove my face into the nearest shoulder/blanket/stuffed animal for maximum effect. The adults go nuts for this.
- Much like a dog with a pill nestled in peanut butter, I’m able to identify any undesirable tidbits in my food and successfully avoid them. I’ve been known to lick the hummus off a carrot and discard the remaining vegetable onto the floor.
- Sometimes I like to take showers with Dad. But only when I’m fully clothed. And when I’m not invited. Surprise showers are the best showers, in my opinion.
- I got my “school” pictures back. Mom blubbered all over them. Typical. I can’t wait to get the wallets so I can trade with all my friends.
- The ‘rents are starting to feel bad about not having a dog for me to be BFFs with. Mostly because I get really excited when I see one, and scream “Bop, bop, bop, bop!” in a high-pitched voice. I’ll break them down eventually.
- Mom finally bought me shoes the other day, which is kind of hilarious. Watching her try to get my foot into a shoe is like watching someone shove a stress ball into a toilet paper roll. Why they don’t make round shoes for guys like me, I’ll never know.
- I’m going to be one next month!!! (Cue Mom crying… Eyeroll.)
Until next time…